NOTE: Before discussing this section, we'd like to make sure that everyone knows that the names have been changed to protect the Indians. BUT seriously, although we used the phrase "Indian Givers", the use is pun intended and not meant to be disrespectful.  DoubleTake wrote this section long ago, before Seinfeld's "Indian" episode and PC, "political correctness", so we hope we offend everyone, not just the Native Americans.

The first Indian tribe to inhabit the Salt River Valley, an area close to the Superstition Mountains, near Phoenix, Arizona, were the Hohokams. (No relation to Santa or the Jolly Green Giant.) This tribe existed for approximately 2000 years and is known to have been very advanced. In fact, the canals that they built are used as the foundation for the City of Phoenix' irrigation system. More important from DoubleTake's viewpoint, relics have been found to indicate that the Hohokams had mining operations.

No one knows exactly what happened to the Hohokams. They may have moved away because of a drought or perhaps perished from disease or from other Indian tribe attacks. Some historians believe that the Hohokams are the forefathers (Can you have 4 fathers?) of the Maricopa and Pima tribes. (Speaking of 4, did you know that alchemists believed all things in the world were made of 4 basic elements: earth, wind, and firewater.)

After the Hohokams, the Maricopas and Pimas inhabited the area. Incidentally, "Hohokam" is actually a word in the Pima language that means "those that have gone".  The Maricopa and Pima Tribes were peaceful, using simple farming techniques to survive and were very fearful of the Superstition Mountains. Storytellers (people who exchange gold legends at the bank?) say that the medicine men told their tribes to stay away from the "Thunder God" of the Superstitions. Others say that the medicine men didn't want their tribes to go near the mountains due to the Apache. The name "Thunder God"  is very appropriate, as the weather can change drastically from sunny to dark torrential skies in a matter of minutes. (Photograph: "The Medicine Man", Northwestern University Library, Edward S. Curtis's 'The North American Indian': the Photographic Images, 2001.

In any event, one Pima Legend "pairallels" one of the most important parts of the Old Testament - the Flood.  It seems that there was a Pima God named either Elder Brother or Cherwit Make [Earth Maker]. He told the tribe that all would be saved from a terrible storm that would last for two moons, similar to the 40 days and nights of rain, ala Noah's Ark. There was just one catch (Catch 22?  You should have seen the one that got away!) -- no one was allowed to speak until the flood waters subsided. Of course, when the tribe was climbing the mountains to escape the rising waters, someone spoke (a squaw, no bout adout it) and the tribe was turned into stone. (We've heard of being stoned before, but these guys got a little carried away with their peace pipe!)  To be "fair" to the female population, another version states that only the evil people were turned into stone.

Although it's not known exactly when, the Superstitions began to be called the "Monte de la Espuma" or the "Foam Mountains". This was because of the white limestone deposits that were left on the tops of the mountains from the Flood.

The Apache, who had been driven out of Mexico by the Spaniards, later inhabited the general (not Custer) area in the 15th Century. (On a side splitting note, did you know that Custer was one of the first people to wear designer clothes?  He ended his career in an Arrow shirt!)  The Apache had not Ben Gentle (a bear of a joke) and in fact, the name "Apache" literally means "enemy". A very fierce tribe that made the Superstitions their fortress, the Apache would often send raiding parties to the peaceful villages, knowing that no one would follow into the mysterious mountains. Finally, the Maricopas tired of the Apache's attacks and went into the mountains to fight them. Although the Apache won the battle, they lost many warriors and thought that the God of Thunder was angry with them. It was at this time that the Apache decided that the land around the tall "hat-looking" mountain should be taboo to all intruders. (We'll "needle" you a lot more about this special mountain, called "Weaver's Needle".)

: The Lone Ranger and Tonto walked into a bar and sat down to drink a beer. After a few minutes, a big tall cowboy walked in and said "Who owns the big white horse outside?" The Lone Ranger stood up, hitched his gun belt, and said, "I do...Why?" The cowboy looked at the Lone Ranger and said, "I just thought you'd like to know that your horse is about dead outside!" The Lone Ranger and Tonto rushed outside and sure enough Silver was ready to die from heat exhaustion. The Lone Ranger got the horse water and soon Silver was starting to feel a little better. The Lone Ranger turned to Tonto and said, "Tonto, I want you to run round Silver and see if you can create enough of a breeze to make him start to feel better." Tonto said, "Sure, Kemosabe" and took off running circles around Silver. Not able to do anything else but wait, the Lone Ranger returned to the bar to finish his drink. A few minutes later, another cowboy struts into the bar and asks, "Who owns that big white horse outside?" The Lone Ranger stands again, and claims, "I do, what's wrong with him this time?" The cowboy looks him in the eye and says,... "Nothing, but you left your Injun runnin'."